Never in the recesses of my hypothalamus have it occured that I would be writing something in this subject. You see, I have always thought of myself as an "invictus" - the unconquered - and that pains of this kind are too far-fetched. But then, after a third stick of Winston Lights, and still craving for more, just to while away my loneliness and longings for any signs of the topic of my mind, tells me otherwise. Add to that the sentimental cravings of whatever that will keep my sanity in stitch and listening to songs celebrating the sacredness of 'aloneness', I am left to admit that something in my system is wrong. And as the question long before asked goes: how can it be wrong when it feels so right?
I always have that great admiration to the power of will and reason but I see myself defying reasons just to give in. I see myself breaking my very rules and shattering the principles I verily erected. Then I say, this should be the last only to find myself again traversing my way to insanity, undergoing the same pain and struggle I have taken.
How can the greatest gift to mankind -LOVE- turn out to be a curse? How can loving be so painful? How can I let this happen?
So I guess, I'm there... and what an experience to be there....
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